- Arrange contact and time with group members between groups.
- Commit yourself to change/learn/practice/use other expressions than the discount “Try”, unless you’re Not fully committed to the action.
- Develop clear, as-measurable as possible, written goals.
- Review your goals regularly, at least quarterly, then date and rate (1-10) on your contract.
- Stay focused on the Present and on Change.
- Take reasonable risks, especially when scared, experimenting/exploring new behaviors in group and between sessions.
- Keep a therapy journal, it really helps!
- Practice new behaviors again and again, in and out of group.
- Watch the video of the group regularly and carefully between sessions, both when present and absent; be sure to take notes and report your observations to your group.
- Put significant energy into homework when it is assigned, and bring it up/discuss it at next session.
- Reward yourself for positive changes, especially for small steps – this is how all animals learn everything ; See Please Don’t Shoot the Dog – Karen Pryor.
- Develop “here and now” skills — be present-focused about what I do and don’t want/feel/think NOW.
- Check-out your perceptions; beliefs, impact; and reactions with others.
- Develop simple, clear and effective communication and intimacy skills (open, honest and direct in the “here and now”; especially notice discounts of self and others = talking/acting as if what is Real is not Real, and what isn’t Real is Real.
- Give others generous, clear feedback.
- Give positive strokes to others for their changes.
- Review this list carefully the first week and monthly thereafter. Be sure to ask me about anything you don’t fully understand – you can be sure at least three other members also need to know.
CenterPoint Psychotherapy Psychology Associates, 3729 Benson Dr. , Raleigh, NC 27609; and Franklin Square, 1829 East Franklin St. Suite 100 J, Chapel Hill, NC 27514
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