Here’re my two seasonal gifts to you. If you work diligently to change this habit of mind and mouth and heart, you’ll be giving yourself the gift of both improved self-esteem and improved relationships with others.
And at this time of gift giving and receiving, just like your birthdays, anniversaries, etc , please do Consider Deeply treating yourself with the same love and kindness you give the Other people you love. A material gift within your budgetary limits is a good place to start. Then give lots of time and thought to something(s) no one else could know you really need or want, you can’t buy for money in a store, and no one else can give you. If you make a Practice of giving yourself these special, subjective gifts, your life will feel and be significantly happier.
Some examples of past gifts to myself and, and of several wise clients: Doing 45 minute appointments, rather than 60 or 50 minutes gave me plenty of time for good therapy, and the extra 5 minutes between clients allows time to make comfortable transition, walk down the stairs with folks for pleasant goodbyes [and increasingly important at my time of life], physical exercise/increasing the blood flow to my brain, peeing, and breathing deeply;
Acceptance and Forgiveness of something in particular [perhaps the two most important processes in healing], especially of one’s self, as well as of the others, the Other, life, God, luck, my body, time, circumstances, situations, losses, mistakes of commission and/or omission, …; starting or stopping something personally important; …
Wait patiently, and the link below will bring interesting, and perhaps, entertaining results.